Driving in Circles
Whether you are a career woman working in your business or the CEO of your family, it’s easy to get lost in the day and the habit of life. One day merging into the next and before you know it, you’re asking yourself where did the year go? The mind easily can throw you a ton of self-doubting thoughts from that inner critic of yours, having to do with second-guessing yourself, Is this career for you? Is it time to venture into something new? Having you wonder if you are stuck in a rut creating thoughts that lead you to question your purpose and value:
- What’s it all about?
- Where’s the passion I used to have?
- Is this as good as it gets?
- I feel like all I am is the disciplinarian in my family.
- Do I bring value to my job, co-workers, career?
By the very nature of living inside your body, you won’t be able to come at your day from a 360-degree vantage point. A good coach will ask you powerful questions that will help you see from all sides and point out the blind spots.
Living in your day-to-day life isn’t any different.
Are You On a Tour of Duty or a Tour of Meaning?
It’s easy to see your role as a variety of tasks. You begin to take a Tour of Duty. For example, how often in raising your children did you find yourself saying, “I feel like all I do is drive my kids from here to there”, or “all I do is run errands come the weekend” or “as a Lawyer I just make sure all the “I’s” are dotted and the “T’s” are crossed. Or, as an Accountant, I make sure numbers add up every day. This is when your mind has you thinking you are lost because you focus on the tasks within the role or position you have. No wonder it can feel as though you’ve lost your passion, you feel depleted maybe even burned out, and you start judging yourself, perhaps thinking yourself as unaccomplished.
This week I invite you to take yourself on a different tour ~ A Tour of Meaning.
Find a spot where you can quiet the mind and pay attention to your heart. Remember its the heart that has the answers, not the mind. We’ve all played the game where we were asked who we would want to have lunch or tea or a glass of wine with if we could. Meryle Streep, Ophra, Michelle Obama, Justice Ruth B. Ginsberg (you get the idea). Envision them asking you the following questions as they don’t know you and need a “tour” of your life, of the many roles you play. The “why” behind the role. The parts of you – your attributes, your personality that you need to do your job or role.
- You are a friend, how are you there for your friend? What’s your mission in being a friend?
- You are a lawyer, what do you do? How do you help someone? What’s your mission?
- You are a CEO. What does that mean? What’s your mission?
- You are a mother. What’s your objective? How do you provide for your family, your children?
A Meaningful Mindshift
Remember above when I referenced the accountant? She described her Tour of Duty as “I make sure all the numbers add up”. But her Tour of Meaning was described as “I help woman secure their financial future so they can live to meet their retirement goals”. Remember the lawyer? Her Tour of Duty was making sure the “I’s” are dotted and the “T’s” are crossed. Her Tour of Meaning was “I work with a client to help them not be a victim of violence” “In my work, I help clients achieve justice when they were taken advantage of” or “I am their legal advocate and am their voice when they are too afraid to use theirs”.
Do you feel the difference?
This week try and shift your mindset from taking a Tour of Duty and get on the bus that takes you to your Tour of Meaning.
I would love for you to email me and share your experience in doing this exercise. And if you feel stuck, email me as well and we can set up 30-minutes, my gift to you, to get you unstuck!