For those of you in the US, Valentine’s Day is this week. It’s a mixed bag when you talk to women, some look forward to the day, some not so much. Either way, I invite you to ask yourself, what are you choosing to make that day mean for you?
What thoughts are starting to spin around that mind of yours? I’m not going to list the many thought possibilities but if you are challenged with a critical inner voice that second-guesses someone’s admiration of you, or passes judgment on you because there may not be a “someone special” in your life right now, if your inner voice tends to throw you thoughts that devalues and negates the “why” behind someone’s loving gesture, or makes you wrong because there’s an absence of one, then you are most likely not standing in your own lovability.
Are You a Believer?
Not being able to commit to knowing and believing yourself as lovable tends to have you seeking outside validation to try and convince you that you are. Remember the reason why you tend to get the same results, for example, you intend to think one way but end up reverting back to an old thought pattern, is because the thought you would rather like to think about yourself isn’t a thought you truly believe (yet).
Perhaps you’ve read the quote “to love another is to first know love for yourself”.
There’s a secret that most women have that runs deep and remains silent.
It’s a secret that isn’t broken because chances are you don’t speak about it.
This secret has to do with your thought about being lovable.
It’s a Common Way of Thinking
I recently received a consultation call and in the box where I ask prospective new clients how does their inner critic show itself, the young woman wrote – “I am not lovable”. It’s so common to believe that the thoughts we have are facts – they aren’t.
On the call I let her know that she was born automatically lovable.
We all carry the lovable gene.
You, I and this young woman, don’t have to work at being lovable because we already are.
Truth is, people tell you all the time how lovable, how special, how amazing, how beautiful, how strong, how competent and capable they experience you as being – time to bridge the gap between how others see you and how you see yourself!
Just because you may think you aren’t lovable. Just because you may think that others don’t experience you as lovable, doesn’t mean that this is a fact. Your thought is based on a story you are telling about yourself. The true power you have is in seeing that you can change the story.
Telling Yourself a Different Story
What if you decided for today, to try on a new thought that you ARE lovable. Period. End of story.
Knowing that you are already lovable and knowing that you don’t have to work at being lovable because you already are, what feeling does that generate? How would that thought and feeling better serve you today? Would you be able to show up in your life today, differently? In the workplace? With your children?
Take it in. Step into it. Bask in it. Feel it. Accept it.
YOU ARE LOVABLE!
End of story.
Celebrate YOUR lovability.
Now, back to my initial question, what are you going to choose to make Valentine’s Day mean to you?
If you feel stuck with wrapping your thought around your lovability would you give 30-minutes of your time to learn how to bridge the gap that keeps you stuck? I’ve got 30-minutes if you do. It’s my gift, just pick any day and show up on the other end of the call. Maybe the most loving thing to consider if you know of a BFF that struggles with feeling less-than or unloveable would be to pass this on to them. It’s time to break that thought habit.
If you are looking for a one time, 80-minute coaching experience that is action-driven and laser-focused the 80-minute mind-shift tune-up coaching call is designed just for you, to get you in and out with a clear vision, action plan and how-to steps to get you moving forward.
Did you miss Ditch That Inner Mean Girl for the New Year? Replay
Photo credit: Aziz Acharki on Unsplash