What to Think?
Life is Noisy
There's a lot of noise to contend with these days, between social media, news media, and the day-to-day messages that we take in from our everyday lives. Add to all of that, the noisy thoughts that our mind throws us, literally 60,000 a day (you only pick out a few of them!). It can be daunting to try and offset the critical voice with a more positive thought as a way to change direction for ourselves. Thoughts are habit forming and if you are challenged by that critical inner voice of yours, doubting yourself, second-guessing decisions, procrastinating because you aren't perfect enough, questioning whether you have what it takes to get "it" done, it's easy to fall back on that which is familiar. In doing so, you end up empowering those limiting, critical thoughts yet again. Changing anything takes work. It's tiring. You want easy. You want quick. After all society more and more (we think) demands immediate gratification and results.
Changing Thought Habits Are Like Giving Up Sugar
The work of coaching is to become more mindful of all those pesky critical thoughts that you've been thinking for so many years now, most of the time they go unrecognized. Yet you act on them, you believe them. That's how powerful a habit it is. I mean, have you tried to give up sugar? The debate is on about which habit is the hardest to break, giving up sugar (an addictive habit we love to hate or hate to love) or our critical thinking. Just like having an alternative to sugar handy at the ready when that sugar craving hits, you need to have new healthier thoughts handy to combat those negative ones that are repeatedly thrown your way. That being said, do you have your new thought cheat sheet ready for the challenge? Here are some positive mantras to try on for size as you move into your week ahead. Find one or two that resonate with you and try them on for size as your "go to" thought to counteract your impulse to listen to the mind if it has you second-guessing yourself, has you thinking yourself as not having what it takes to get the task done, at not being good enough, at doubting yourself. Press that delete button and step into one of these thoughts instead.
Pick a Thought, Any Thought:
- There's plenty of time.
- You are imperfectly perfect, which is perfectly ok.
- Your past doesn't define you.
- There is nothing anyone else can do to make you happy - that's your job.
- What you do doesn't make you happy rather what you think does.
- What others think of you - whether positive or negative - is about them and not you.
- Trying to get someone to love you to feel loved is like getting someone else to eat so you can feel full.
- Everything is as it should be.
- It was meant to happen the way it did.
- You are exactly as you should be.
- Love is always an option.
- You are responsible for everything you think and feel.
- Unconditional love is something you give yourself.
- People are allowed to behave the way they want and you are allowed to react the way you want.
- There is nothing you can do that wouldn’t be worthy of forgiveness.
- Nothing has gone wrong here.
To make these new thoughts even more powerful? Once you have found a thought or two that resonate, say them in the first person. Change "you" to "I" and think about recording them on your phone so you can listen to the thoughts you've chosen, in your own voice. SUPER POWERFUL!
Next Steps
Changing any habit starts with setting the intention to do so. It takes time and patience. More importantly, it takes the ability to be aware of what your thoughts are. Sounds silly, you say "of course I know what I am thinking". How often are you reacting to something to someone? How often are you feeling something and not sure how you got there. Feelings, actions, inactions and yes, our results, all start with a thought. And because thoughts are habit forming, most often we've thought the same thing over and over, we aren't in touch with it. Becoming aware is the work of coaching. Want a different result in how you think about yourself? How do you think about someone else? How do you think about a situation you are in? Your career for example? Step into coaching. My goal is to help you see these blind spots and uncover them. Then you have clarity. Ready to explore more? Step into a no cost, 30-minute call with me. On the call we will:
- Help you get started on tackling a challenge you are dealing with;
- Discuss the benefits of working together, and
- You will walk away with at least 1 coaching tool and strategy that you can immediately put into action!
If you are looking for a one time, 80-minute coaching experience that is action-driven and laser-focused the 80-minute mind-shift tune-up coaching call is designed just for you, to get you in and out with a clear vision, action plan and how-to steps to get you moving forward. Did you miss Ditch That Inner Mean Girl for the New Year? Replay